It Can't Rain All the Time

How does it feel when nothings
Really yours?
Pins in the map
Foot to the floor.
Keep on the road
Just keep driving.
Keep driving.
Another state’s waiting
One more night you won’t forget
The newest snapshot memory
The newest life you have to leave.
Before you even started it.
And nothing ever amounts to much
Somehow the pieces are never enough

The pictures come out blurry
Of her nights spent killing time.
One more in the scrapbook,
For a youth that’s slowly dying.
But she’s collecting memories,
Of everything she can’t keep
And keeps on filing
All the days spent in the sun,
So when she’s sad she can look back
On all that kept her sane and smiling.

And now she’s on the road at night
Somewhere half through Kansas
Thinking about picking one thing
And really sticking to it
She wonders about the ones she’s loved,
What they’re doing in that minute.
And writes them a song in her head
And hopes they somehow hear it.

And there on that road that night
With the windshield wipers singing,
She thinks back on other things,
Back at the beginning.
How she got some comfortable
On her own
Wonders when the scenery got so boring
And tries to come to terms with
All these tiny deaths and mournings.

She wonders if she’s crazy
If anyone would understand this
The way she moves from place to place
But sometimes just can’t stand it.
And everyone always leaves,
Which is why she’s always leaving.
But she’s got a pack of smokes
And music notes,
To help get her through the grieving

And she knows the landmarks well,
Because they’re always the same.
They let her know when to stop.
The next gas station’s waiting.
She alternates between bouts of hope
And feeling like shes dying
But by leading all these lives,
She’s learned the key to surviving.

If you’re driving all night friend,
Look for her.
Heading through Missouri
She’ll be the one with golden hair,
Dragging more baggage than she can carry.
Windows down in the rain,
She’ll wear a knowing smile,
Singing Sweet Caroline
At the top of her lungs
To stop the thoughts awhile.

Soon her journey will be over
To a week spent not alone
She’s crossing the Illinois state line now
Cutting up toward her childhood home
The rain it beats harder
Beneath her the wild Mississippi roars
And if it all becomes too much,
She’ll stop to sleep somewhere warm
On the road again at dawn
Chasing things she can't ignore.

Your Nightlight

He asks how the weather is where I’m at.
I tell him it’s cold here and he just laughs.
Because he knows what I mean.

And it’s 100 degrees from burning your letters,
And this town’s dead.
I’ve cut down the trees so you can’t write anymore.
But I remember what you said.

Keeps his loaded gun close to his bed,
One bullet for every thought in his head.
Each one like broken glass,
Fell in love with apathy,
It’ll never last.

I’m checking out the scene,
Where you killed all of our dreams,
Hold that thought.

I hope it keeps you warm at night.
I hope it fucking sets you on fire.
And whoever you’re burning with dies with you.
A nightlight for a beautiful liar.

Keeps his loaded gun close to his bed,
One bullet for every thought in his head.
Each one like broken glass,
Fell in love with apathy,
It’ll never last.

How’s it working out?
Was it everything you dreamed about?
I’m not coming home again.

So we can keep not making eye contact.
So I can keep my thoughts to myself.
Start caring less,
Finish the chapter and put it back on the shelf.

Keeps his loaded gun close to his bed,
One bullet for every thought in his head.
Each one like broken glass,
Fell in love with apathy,
It’ll never last.

Called you last night.
Held this disease up to the light.
I told you about him.

Said, “I think I’m a zombie”
Said “I think I’ve stopped breathing
I know I had a heart,
But I’m sure it’s done beating.

Keeps his loaded gun close to his bed,
One bullet for every thought in his head.
Each one like broken glass,
Fell in love with apathy,
It’ll never last.
How’s it working out?
Was it everything you dreamed about?
I’m not coming home again.
I’m burning all your letters.